Sunday, August 26, 2012

Ramblings

Well fall is almost here and I'm sitting here waiting for it. Cooler weather is so what I need. we had really nice weather and then BAM it was gone. I'm not complaining but I'm a fall winter person. As most of my kids are too. We have been field tripping alot these last few weeks. Kids learning like never before. My little Laurabeth is almost walking.SCARY! I have many wild Indians in this house and having a baby Indian on that floor is never a good idea. My days are now full of " Oh my goodness, Watch out!, grab her, Laurabeth NO!" Yes my Cindy Crawford Meaningful beauty is getting a run for its money here. Laura is either fighting of big sister Jolene who thinks she is a rag doll or the wild Indians are running past her so fast she wipes out. The best spot for her to be is latched on to the jugs so know one can hurt her or bump her. Jolene is like a dozen bulls wrapped into a child's body. She is wild and full of adventure. She reminds me of Cody when he was little.
 Our life in the homeschool world has changed yet again. This time it is where it was before only difference is I am totally cool with it. we have learned text books are my kids worst enemies. I pulled them out they hid. I yelled, and sure enough they yelled back. I said sit they said see ya. See the pattern there. We hated it. So I did what every crazy child loving mom would do. I got rid of all the text books. I know I know you are saying what did she do. Her kids will never learn those hippies. I bought My Fathers World curriculum which is a CM method. No real texts books. As we are plugging away at that we just weren't happy to sit and school and make sure this was done and that. They just weren't excited about learning. Another we homeschool is that out kids have a passion to learn. Not the sit here for X amount of time and write X paper for a grade that just tells your brain isn't working. Now I have always been the type of person that goes down the path no one really does. I like adventure and I LOVE to get out and explore the world. Always have. I'm not sure if its because I hit 30 in July and I grew my bog girl panties or what. Maybe it was when I started this homeschool journey many years ago, even knowing how I wanted it to go and what I liked, I fell in the homeschool trap. The trap that no matter what you do you will be judged. Well that scared me I guess. Thinking that now my kids future is in my hands and I'm surely going to screw them up if I don't use use curriculum or go here or start our morning with this. I was scared that I wouldn't be that homeschool mom I seen at the group or the homeschool mom who is crammed down my throat. 6 years into it and I finally can say PROUDLY that I'm not that homeschool mom. I'm just a wife, mother, sister and daughter. I'm the one who rebels against the normal and does things on my own terms. I like we unschool. I thrive my kids thrive my husband laughs and likes the wife he married. Theres reasons for the seasons in life we have. Nothing here really has changed. We do things the way we want. No planner, no text books, no time. For the first time in EVER my 11 year old went to the library and pulled he liked and didn't complain ONE TIME! That was huge for him. He pulled books on fossils, rocks, survival guides, insects. All things he loves and learns on his own. Theres no pressure from me or dad to read it. He just does. Hannah has always been a learner and lover of books so when this child goes to the library she brings back the library! Like I said no pressure to learn. Its just what kids do when they are happy and can pick what they like and learn from it. The world is huge and we plan to use it. Unschooling isn't right for everyone. maybe just a few of us really. Its we like and its how we learn and grow.
 As I'm writing this its FINALLY raining! Hannah and Cody are at the picnic with my mom for her work and it happens to rain on that day! hahaha. Boy do we need the rain. The farmers out here are already cutting their corn because its a loss. The only thing growing in the weeds.








 We have some really neat field trips coming up. Friday we are apple pickin and then the Friday after that we are going to Pioneer Boones farm thingy. They will learn some pioneer skills. The Nature Reserve is having their Prairie Day On the 15th and they do that every other year and we never miss it. Its always tons of fun. This year I think we will dress the part. Our own halfpint will have to get a dress.Well I better get off here the littles are attacking the craft room with full force! Blessings.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

A right to vent...

As a mom, wife, daughter, sister, HUMAN... I get the right to vent without people texting,emailing or leaving comments that are as childish as ever. Im going to vent but if you cant handle an adult woman venting stop reading. Must will say " Oh man I have been there or I am there right now". Just because I vent doesnt mean I dont like my calling as the things said above. I cherish them all. But every once in awhile it builds up and BAM it needs to come out.

 Im running on  a little over an hours sleep from last night. The last few months Laurabeth has been up 6 plus times at night to either nurse like a newborn or just lay on me knowing she can nurse when she feels her head come close to my jugs. As I love nursing and the blal blah blah I went out last night and bought the formula and a bottle. Yes the toxic powder I hear you are to never give to your baby because Oh my it horrid. Got home to have my husband with is popping out of his head because I left the 3 little middle littles with him for 40 mins and they went crazy on him. Well I made that horrid bottle and even stuffed oatmeal in the dang thing. Having high hopes of her settling into my lap and laying there looking at me while she sucked that bottle dry. For real she was screaming like I was pulling her teeth. She threw the bottle across the room over and over again. She wailed like moms boobs were now a thing of the past. It was so bad! She didnt take one drop of the beloved bottle. I ended up waking up 7 times and nursing 7 times all night long. My mind is shot and im NO good today! I told Jeff I was moving Jolenes crib in our room and then Lauras crib in her room and she WILL cry it out tonight. Praising GOd I only have one neighbor who already im sure thinks Im nuts but she has a baby the same age as Laura so hearing a baby cry at night will not alarm her.
 I HATE that everyday of every freaking morning I have to give a DETAILED list of things to my older 2 kids. Its like every night when they hit the pillow it somehow strips their memory and we start over. Everyday they have to be told do their chores, every detail of that said chore has to be given. Im shocked everyday I dont have to remind them to wipe their butts! You would think with by now they would have this down. I guess I need my mom here every morning to tell me to get Laura and change her diaper, feed her and all the other kids because I cant do it with that detailed voice reminder.
 Im sick and tired of the WORLD cramming poison down my kids throat. I hate every thing we buy theres dyes and crap in it. My child has an ulcer and NO body listens to what he can and cant have even ME! Who in there right mind would even ALLOW food or drinks down his throat if it was slowly causing him to end up back in the hospital. Well im the only one to blame because im weak and stupid. I allowed it over and over again and now my child is hacking up acid and cant swallow again. Its me who listens to him cry for a soda or a snack food and I give him. I have let him down. I hate that I now have to eat fruits and veggies and cant enjoy a nice greasy hamburger because I decided to not lose weight in between my baby making periods. Now I suffer from being fat and I feel like dog crap. I hate that now I must work out everyday and even though I enjoy working out and kickboxing only picturing the person I hate the must while slamming the punch and kick, I hate it. Only because I have to do because I need to lose weight. Id love to have another baby or babies but I cant right now because im so stinking fat!
 I also im sooo upset over the fact my husband doesnt see that I actually truly work my ass off. Im sorry who takes care of the kids 24/7, cooks, makes sure your lunch is packed and ready for you, who does the laundry so when you open your dresser you have clothes, or scrubs the toilet after many boys come in and piss all over not only the lid but the wall and fall.Who makes dinner ever night? Even after I make dinner and spent my time doing it you still sit at the table and spit it out like I feed you cat food. Nice hun nice!!
 I even hate the fact im blogging right now. Who really reads this blog? Who wants to read a blog about a crazy redneck mom and her wild Indians. Right now I have my 4 year screaming in my ear that he is dying because I wont turn the tv on and give him milk. Oh man I have a love hate relationship with the tv! I love that they can watch nice shows but I hate that every freaking break is a half naked woman having sex with a new food they came out with. Really people. Cant you do better than that???

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